When learning Focusing we gradually and systematically increase our understanding and tools. The focuser learns more suggestions for self guiding and the companion learns more ways to support the Focuser. These suggestions are like training wheels. As understanding of the process grows and you have engaged in many practice sessions then you will find what works best for you, based on the general principles. And when you are grounded in the general principles, you will no longer need the training wheels.
While learning to Focusing it is helpful to bring to our practice sessions a situation in life that feels stuck, constricted or incomplete in some way. Of course this is not always the case but it is easiest to learn the principles of Focusing if we bring an "issue" to mind. If you are not feeling anything in life that is a concern then it will be helpful to consider something specific that you would like to explore.
For most people thinking about an issue doesn't bring it to resolution. If it did, we wouldn't need to pause and invite a bodily sense of it. Long before our adult years, we develop the capacity to think about something. If simply thinking about a concern always helped move forward. life would be easy. But we frequently need a process such a focusing, a mind-body awareness method that helps bring clarity and freedom from old emotional patterns.
In focusing we learn a process that allows us to sense an issue in the body freshly. We invite a feeling sense of the issue as a whole to arise, in the current moment.
In order to allow a feeling sense of the issue to arise, many people need to pause and intentionally turn their attention to the body, especially the inner areas of the body. During a partner exchange when both the Focuser and the Companion are learning there is a suggested way to start a session to insure greatest success. That way it outlined as a series of questions on the companion's crib sheet.
At this point in our progressive learning we start a session with the Companion asking a series of simple questions. The last question is "Do you have an issue or something that you would like to explore?”
This is an invitation to the Focuser to briefly share an issue or something that she world like to explore. At this point it is not that the exploration has started in a Focusing way. It is simply that a few sentences about the topic is shared.
Then the companion reflects along these lines.
"So there is something about (the situation that the Focuser brought up) that
then follows with one of the following
- you are wanting to explore
- brings feeling of _______
- feel _______
- or your voice could just trail off
The focuser takes in that reflection from the companion
Then comes, on the part of the Focuser, a turning of her attention inward, what we call the "coming in" stage. This turning within stage also helps cultivate Self in Presence. At this stage of our practice the companion will practice "leading-in" the Focuser during the "coming in" stage. While we have our training wheels on, I ask that the Focuser answers, "Yes" to the companion's question, " Would you like me to lead you in?"
The lead-in also ends with an invitation along the lines of, "And gently invite what wants your awareness now [about that issue ___________].”
This invitation is at the end of the lead-in so that the Focuser can sense the situation freshly, how it is showing up inwardly, in the body in this moment.